2025 Walk to Remember — Opening Remarks

Good Morning! Thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk about my grandson Levi today and my relationship with him. My name is Marci Sutkowski, I am Levi Vitale’s paternal grandmother. I was fortunate to not only be Levi’s Grammy, I am also one of his God mothers. I am here today with my son John, Levi’s dad, my wife Kathy, his other Godmother, and Anthony, Levi’s paternal grandfather also known as Pops. Here is Levi’s story through my eyes.

The news of Levi’s upcoming arrival came as a bit of a surprise to all of us. Levi’s parents were in a relatively new relationship and they were both early on in their recovery process. It came to our attention they needed our help! Without hesitation, Pops cleared out space at his house where he and John lived. They moved in Levi’s mom Alex in and turned a spare bedroom into a nursery for Levi. We had the gender reveal, the baby shower, the parenting classes. We were ready! Finally, on July 12th, 2024 Levi was born! Pops and I were fortunate to be able to see him that night and I think I can speak for him, that we both immediately fell in love. The prince had arrived!

It really was a team effort once Levi came home from the hospital. I would help out in the early morning hours a few days a week so John and Alex could get some sleep. On the mornings I wasn’t there Pops had his time with Levi. We were really great at co-grandparenting! Since we were so involved with his care it gave us the chance to create a really strong bond with him. We had his baptism in October, what a fantastic day that was! The whole family got together to celebrate Levi! My side, Pops’ side, Alex’s side along with our church family and friends. Levi was such a happy baby, his smile would light up his whole face along with my heart. We had the perfect relationship. He loved to be held and I loved holding him, he loved to eat and I loved feeding him, he loved napping and I loved holding him while he napped, I loved to give him a million kisses and he let me! I absolutely adored him. I actually started to feel a little guilty at how much I loved him. Did I love him more than I loved my own children? But it wasn’t that, it’s just a different kind of love. I’m older now, I can appreciate how fast the time goes and how quickly they grow. While Levi was in my care nothing else mattered. He got 100% of my attention. Dishes could wait, laundry could wait. Everything would get done when he want home to his parents.

Levi was a skeleton for Halloween last year and he got his face painted at trunk or treat. We got to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas with him, what a great addition to our family he was. Levi’s personality really started coming out now. He had an ice cream truck exersaucer that he loved to jump in. Even when he was sick he would be bouncing away! His favorite song was I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas. It took 4 plays on repeat to get Levi from Pops’ house to mine. Levi got to celebrate his daddy’s 27th birthday with a surprise party in February. Levi loved to grab his daddy’s ears! There was nothing like watching my son be a father to Levi. I could see the love in his eyes for him, truly special. Levi was growing and hitting his milestones.

Then everything changed in an instant. March 10, 2025. Pops was in Florida for work and Kath and I had an early morning flight to Aruba. We had just landed and checked into our hotel room when I got the call from Pops. Levi had gone down for a nap and flipped. He was unable to flip back and suffocated. I couldn’t believe it, I was in total shock. He had to be joking, but I knew he would never joke about that. I was frantic! How could this be? He can’t be gone! I’m supposed to take him shopping for clothes on Friday! They have to save him! I have to get home to see my son. It was such a horrible feeling not being able to comfort my son on the worst day of his life. It was the worst day of my life too. We did make it back late that night. Aruba and back in a day. The following days are just a blur of disbelief and shock. I had never felt grief like this before. Totally encompassing and gut wrenching, I’ve never wanted to change one thing so badly! We were fortunate to have so much support from family and friends. One of my neighbors Megan Dunn is on the board for the Massachusetts Center for Unexpected Infant and Child Death and she got me in touch with Shelly. Shelly was so helpful. She let me rant and rave and talked me off the ledge on one of my many walks. She found a therapist for me that took my insurance. I was in no state of mind to do this myself so having her as a resource during such a difficult time made such a difference. Shelly also got me in touch with the Roberts Program at Boston Children’s Hospital where Levi is part of a study they are doing on unexpected infant and child death. While his death was an accident they look into genetics and other factors that may have played a role. I also had the opportunity to talk with a fellow grandmother Lisa who is here today. She unfortunately lost her granddaughter in 2017. Talking with Lisa was so comforting to me. She knew how I was feeling without me having to put it into words. To see your child face such a devastating loss and not be able to help them is just heartbreaking.

I’ve been looking forward to this walk since I found out about it, it’s a way to honor him. While I am still completely devastated over the loss of Levi, I am trying to remember all the love he gave to me. The last time I saw him is embedded in my mind. Kath and I had him at our house for a few hours because we were going away and wouldn’t see him for 5 whole days! When I brought him home to his parents I have him the usual kiss and headed for the door. As I got to the door I thought I better get another one. Alex was holding him in front of the fridge and I went back over to him. He reaches for me and I gave him a final kiss. I just had no idea it would be the last one I ever gave him. I wouldn’t trade the pain for the love. We had a lifetime of love squished into his 8 short months and I know I will see him again. Thank you again for giving me the opportunity to tell you about Levi.

- Marci Sutkowski